Hollywood Royalty?

Whatever happened to Hollywood Royalty? There was a time when an actor or actress could depend on a studio to protect and defend them as though they were heirs to the throne. Household servants and the legions of artistic and creative forces which surrounded these deities could keep a secret and did not sell out to cheap gossip magazines so hastily. Most bad press was carefully orchestrated by paid publicists and management. I myself was used in many a scandal back in the day. My reported affair with Liberace and my "love child" with Vic Mature were all created to boost my box office and raise my ratings. Bad publicity was better than no publicity at all. Occasionally some of those stories were based in fact. I was linked to a crime syndicate boss, several married men, a house of prostitution, several drunken brawls involving firearms, and numerous arrests for public nudity. But did it hurt my image? Honey, that WAS my image. I was one of the few who actually lived up to the reputation reported in the press. I worked damn hard at maintaining a gutter level persona and had a hell of a good time while doing so. For example; I called the press and said that a drunken woman was scaling the Washington Square arch in nothing but a pair of lace panties and a push up bra. I reported that she was screaming obscenities at passersby and when confronted by law enforcement, spit and yelled," Doesn't anybody want this hot pussy?" I then quickly ran from the pay phone, got to the park,stripped down to my underwear and took a dump on a park bench. The next day in the trades it read," Lawson Loses It!" and I was back on the top of the bottom. Fuck Shelly Winters! Nobody does "crazy" like Helen Lawson, remember?

So let's encourage the new guard...the Liza Minnelli's and the Faye Dunaway's to get a little crazy, take some risks. Maybe, if they're lucky, they'll end up like me.